


Left in Pieces

by aj_black



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen, Hogwarts, Hogwarts Seventh Year, Post-War, Wizards, voldemort - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:48:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28421958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aj_black/pseuds/aj_black
Summary: The War wreaked havoc on everybody. For Belladonna it was the death of her sister and her parents estrangement. For Draco Malfoy it was the end of the War and the defeat of Lord Voldemort. They are both in pieces, their lives torn apart.Will the comfort of each other put their lives back together?
Kudos: 1





	Left in Pieces

**Author's Note:**

> Some of my chapters will get pretty dark so at the start of each chapter I will put a TW if any upsetting events occur in the chapter.  
> This is a post-war Harry Potter fanfiction. It will mostly be focused on Draco Malfoy and my OC and their life and struggles after the War.  
> I do not support JKR's transphobic views.  
> My OC in this story's name is Belladonna Cassia Shafiq and she is a 7th year Slytherin.  
> TW- mention of death and self-harm

When coldness wraps this suffering clay,

Ah! whither strays the immortal mind?

It cannot die, it cannot stay,

But leaves its darken'd dust behind.

Then, unembodied, doth it trace

By steps each planet's heavenly way?

Or fill at once the realms of space,

A thing of eyes, that all survey?

September 5, 1998  
Everything was too bright, the sun coming in through the window and the smiles of her friends as if the War never happened.  
Belladonna used to pretend it didn't happen but whenever she would try to forgot fresh horrors arrived in the back of her mind. The War wreaked havoc on everybody, even those who had no affiliation to a side like Bella's family. Her family was pureblood through and through but had never openly supported Lord Voldemort. Bella's parents adored the Lords views on Muggleborns and Muggles and they used to say when he won the War was when they would pledge their allegiance to him. But that never did happen, the Order won the War and The Boy Who Lived continued to live. So now Bella's parents have locked themselves in their home and are grieving. Grieving for the lost war but most of all greining for their lost daughter who nobody could save, not even Bella. Bella's sister was a vibrant, lively girl who was named for her parents favourite flower, Calendula.  
Bella had not even known her sister was in the castle when the Battle was happening, some person thought it was a good idea to not wake up any Slytherins that were not in their line of sight. So when Bella's sister heard noises coming from outside the Slytherin Dungeons she had raced out to see what was going on, it was around the same time the seventh floor had blown up. The Slytherin Dungeons being right under the explosions path debris fell from the ceiling and caved in the entrance Bella's sister had been right in its way. Bella had come down the corridor and their were Slytherin students everywhere, she had seen green and silver ties peeking out from under pieces of ceiling and Theodore Nott standing over a body of what looked like a random young girl. Bella had started to walk away when she realised Theo was not standing over the body of a random girl but it was her sister. That was when Belladonna's life had fallen apart.  
Bella had blamed herself for her sisters death for so long, if only she had warned her or gotten her out earlier. Her friends had told her to stop blaming herself, that Bella didn't even know her sister was in the castle but she couldn't help herself. Her parents didn't blame her for what happened to their youngest daughter but Bella knew they thought she could have helped her sister in some way. It wasn't like Bella hadn't tried or anything, she had done every Healing charm she could think of and when those didn't work she just cradled her dead sisters body till Theo had to physically pull Bella of her. Bella hasn't said a word about her sister's death since, she had never said much or done much since then. Bella's parents had forced her to attend her makeup seventh year at Hogwarts after the War. So here she was now sitting on the train to her final year at Hogwarts squinting at the sun coming in through the window. Outside the door to the cabin the trolley witch called in through a door making Bella jump a little bit in her seat, startled at how loud the witch was.  
"Belladonna, you okay?" she heard Theo ask her, looking over at her concerningly.  
"Yeah, Theo I'm fine" she replied settling back in her seat.  
"Ok, tell me if you need anything." he responded.  
"Ok Theo" the witch responded leaning her head against the wall of the train cabin meaning to take a quick nap before they get to Hogwarts.  
"Is she ok?" Bella heard Pansy ask Theo.  
"She says she is but her parents say that she doesn't talk much or eat much at home." Theo answers and Bella can feel him glance at her then quickly glance back at Pansy.  
"Maybe returning to Hogwarts and being with friends will help" Pansy responds.  
"Yeah, maybe" Theo responds sceptically.  
"I don't know, returning to a place something where something traumatic has happened to you doesn't always make you feel better" Bella heard a voice from the corner say. She knew that voice, the low gravely one that sometimes haunted her nightmares. That voice belonged to Draco Malfoy who was sitting in the corner of the cabin looking thoughtfully at Theo and Pansy. Bella had never heard him say something that thoughtful before, let alone anything that sympathetic.  
"Bloody hell Malfoy i don't think I've ever heard you say something that caring before" said Theo. Belladonna can hear Draco audibly scoff and he didn't say anything else.  
"I'm just worried about her. You know?" said Pansy ignoring Theos comment.  
"Yeah, I worry about her too but Bella's strong. She will get through it" Theo said caringly.  
"She is strong, just maybe keep an eye on her please" Pansy said looking between Draco and Theo.  
"Yeah, Yeah" Draco and Theo responded at the same time. Bella heard someone get up and heard the door to the cabin open. She assumed it was Pansy since she was the only one of them that was not in robes yet. Bella shifted in place a little bit in her seat trying to get comfortable again. She pulled her robe sleeves down over her hands and closed her eyes trying to sleep again.  
"Theo, do you know how her sister died?" she heard Draco ask Theo.  
"It's not my place to say. When she thinks the time is right she will tell you." Theo responded.  
"Ok" Draco mumbled and Bella heard him shift his weight on his seat.  
"She will tell us at some point just give her time to heal" Theo said just as Pansy re emerged into the cabin and took back her seat. Bella heard her mumble something to Draco and the cabin lapsed into silence again leaving Bella to her own thoughts. Ever since the War she was broken, broken by her sisters death and broken by the deaths of fellow friends and classmates. She lived her days as a ghost in her own body. Eat, sleep and reassure people that she was fine. Bella had to make sure her parents knew that she was fine and eating even though she was not. They had to know she was sleeping even though she was not. They had to know she was fine even though she was not. They had to know she was not in pieces even though she was. Bella had been in pieces since her sister died and maybe she would never be able to be put back together.  
\---  
Draco shifted his weight in his seat and straightened his posture too. He scratched his left forearm and adjusted his robe sleeve. After the War everything happened so quickly, his father going to Azkaban, his life falling apart in front of his eyes and his fathers release from Azkaban. He moved everyday as if he were a ghost. Pretend everything was okay and just get on with his life. When the opportunity came up to finish his seventh year he jumped right on it. Draco thought coming back to Hogwarts would make him feel better, maybe it will or maybe it wouldn't. Hogwarts was like his second home, he liked it even more than his own home. Dracos gaze flitted around the cabin and rested on Belladonnas figure curled up in the corner of the seat opposite him. She was different this year, the War changed her. Her sister dying right in front of her changed her. When Draco asked earlier if Theo knew how Bella's sister died he had lied, he knew exactly how her sister died. He had been there for fucks sake. Theo hadn't seen him nor Belladonna, he had been trying to get all the Slytherins out when the ceiling had collapsed. Draco was still in the Common Rooms so the ceiling barley missed him but when Bella had arrived he was standing by the door to the hallway. He saw how she flung herself at her sister and had hugged her tightly. Draco say how she kept holding on to her and crying and shaking and asking her sister to just come back and to not leave her alone. He had seen Theo try to get her to leave her sister and saw him try to pry Bella off her dead sisters body. Now looking at her sleeping on the cabin bench he realizes how terrible she looks. Bella is skinnier than when he had last saw, her face sunken and her limbs sticking out. Her eyes had huge bags under them and her complexion was paler than before. Draco also noticed she was quieter than before, moving around as if she was a ghost. Barley talking and seeming to float around everywhere. He noticed that everywhere she went she would keep her sleeves over her hands as if she was always cold, sometimes she would twinge if her forearm caught on anything. Draco didn't want to read into it too much but he had his suspicions about what was going on, he didn't want to assume anything. Draco took some time to study her and see her without all the things he has just noticed. Long dark hair almost black threaded through with lighter brown hair, brown eyes the color of dark tree bark, long eyelashes that when if she closes her eyes they hit the top of her cheekbones, and her skin was a light brown that complimented her brown eyes and hair. Draco slid his eyes down her body and noticed her twitch slightly in her sleep. He felt bad for her, to lose her sister and then have to return to the place she was killed.  
"Draco, you seem lost in thought. What are you thinking about?" said Theo looking at him curiously.  
"My heads empty mate" Draco replied smirking at him. Theo flipped him off and Draco did it back.  
"Is your head always full of air?" Pansy asked from beside Bella, looking up at the two boys.  
"Everyday Pans, everyday" Draco said.  
"That explains so much mate" Theo responded. Draco shoved his shoulder and Theo yelped, startling Belladonna from her sleep.  
"Will you please stop being so loud" she said groggily rubbing her eyes and stretching.  
"Sorry Bella just having fun" Theo said rubbing the shoulder Draco hit him on.  
"S'okay Theo, we are almost at Hogwarts anyway" Bella responded sending a smile to Theo.  
"Are you guys excited for our last year at Hogwarts?" Pansy asked.  
"I know I am" Theo said.  
"I cant' wait till we start classes!" Bella responds excitedly clapping her hands together her face lighting up.  
"I think your the only Slytherin who actually likes classes Bella" Draco says looking over at her his voice dripping disdain.  
"How are you not a Ravenclaw. Your nice, smart and actually love work" Theo said.  
"The Hat considered putting me in Ravenclaw but it said that I had too many Slytherin qualities to be a Ravenclaw" Bella supplies making sure she has got all her luggage.  
"That's a very logical answer. Thank you for explaining Belladonna" Pansy said and Theo and Draco started laughing.  
"Don't make fun of me, I was just explaining since you asked" Bella said pouting her lips.  
"I was not making fun of you I was just thanking you" Pansy replies.  
"Yeah, I totally believe you" Bella says smiling, rolling her eyes. Draco sees the forcedness of it, the way it doesn't quite reach her ears like a real smile and how it drops quickly after she thinks nobody is looking. He knows what it's like putting a mask up for people, he did it all through sixth year and is still doing it to this day. It wasn't easy to keep the Mask up, it took up most of your time trying to keep it from not slipping so everybody believes you are okay. Draco could tell that Bella was not okay, but nobody is.  
"Were almost at the station" Pansy says looking out the window and everybody starts to get their luggage.  
"Do any of you need help carrying your luggage?" Draco says watching Bella struggle to pick up all her luggage.  
"Really?" Bella said turning to him.  
"Yeah, here give me one of your bags" he says holding out his hand that isn't carrying his luggage. Bella picks one of her bags and hands it to Draco. While doing so the sleeve of her robe came down showing a bit of her forearm. The skin of her forearm was littered with raised scars some bright red and others just thin lines. Bella noticed him looking and quickly pulled the arm of her robe down again looking away from him and picking up the rest of her luggage. Draco couldn't believe what he just saw, but maybe he should. He decides that he shouldn't ask her or bring it up, its her own problems. He picks up the rest of his luggage just as the train pulls into the station at Hogsmeade and pulls open the door to their cabin.  
"Okay everybody lets go" Draco says stepping aside to let everybody through the door.  
"Why thank you Mr.Malfoy" Theo jokes walking through the door.  
"Yeah thanks Malfoy" Pansy says too following Theo out.  
"Thank you Draco" Belladonna says stepping out of the compartment.  
"You're very welcome Ms.Shafiq" Draco replies as she walks past him in a flurry of lemon and lavender scented air. He closes the door and follows her down the hallway to the exit of the train. They make their way down the hall until they reach the exit.  
"You can go first" Bella says letting him move in front of her. Draco jumped down from the train and onto the platform and moved out of the way to let Bella jump down. Bella moves to the edge of the train and jumped down lightly. She moves her bags around in her arms and starts to walk towards the carriages that will take them finally to Hogwarts. Draco runs to catch up to her as she meet up with Pansy and Theo.  
"Does anybody know where Blaise is?" said Pansy.  
"He was in the prefect cabin, apparently he is Head Boy this year." Theo responds.  
"What???" exclaimed Bella looking over at Theo.  
"That lucky bugger!" Draco responds laughing.  
"Yeah he told me when I saw him at King Cross this morning." said Theo.  
"Bet you missed me" Blaise says while coming up behind them as if he was summoned.  
"Blaisey boy!" Theo said clapping Blaise on the back.  
"Hows taking care of the kiddos Zabini?" said Draco.  
"Boring as usual" he replies.  
"Nice to see you Blaise" Pansy says.  
"Parkinson" said Blasie with a nod of his head.  
"Hello Blaise, how was your summer?" Belladonna questions ever polite.  
"It was fine, thank you for asking Belladonna" Blaise responds "How was yours?"  
"Oh it was fine" Belladonna said smiling up at Blaise. Draco could tell it was a false smile just like all her other smiles he had seen since they got on the train.  
"Oh that's good!" said Blaise. The group had finally reached a carriage and they all piled inside it squishing together in the tiny carriage.  
"Excited for another year at Hogwarts all?" Blaise asks receiving a mixed response from the group. Some of them said yes and some said no, which was true for most years they returned to Hogwarts. But this year was different, everybody had lost something in the War and returning to Hogwarts would be different for everyone. Draco knew it would be different for him because the last time he was at Hogwarts was during the War but he didn't really remember any of that. The last memory he had at Hogwarts was when he was almost forced to kill Dumbledore but Snape had saved him from that. Almost everybody hates him for that, the sixteen year old Voldemort employed to kill the Headmaster of Hogwarts, but nobody hates on Snape the actual killer of Dumbledore. Nobody hates on the actual murderer but they hate on the boy who almost did it. Everybody portrays Snape as a hero now because he was secretly helping the Order, but nobody portrays Draco as a hero for not actually fucking killing the guy he was supposed to kill. Draco thinks about life before the War, when he lived everyday to please his father and please the Dark Lord. He now realizes that his fathers and Voldemort's opinion was shit. Belladonna was the only opinion that mattered to Draco, she had always been cheerful and supportive of everyone. Draco didn't know why he felt so compassionate towards Belladonna but ever since he had met her, she softened him a little bit. Draco ,like Bella, had been in pieces since the War. His life had scattered itself all over the place, with his father's time in Azkaban and his own trial. Draco's life was in pieces and maybe Belladonna was the only one who could put them back together.

**Author's Note:**

> Poem at the beginning is called "When coldness wraps this suffering clay" by Lord Byron


End file.
